As most of you know shortly before Christmas, I quit my full time "dream job" to work a couple of days a week and stay home with my little man. It's worked out so far....except for the last couple of weeks, maybe more like 6 Dawson has become incredibly clingy to me. It's pretty bad, honestly. When he was in daycare full time, I dropped him off smiling and happy every morning. I picked him up the same way. Now he goes 2 days a week and he literally starts crying before we leave the house and continues to cry on and off all day long. This breaks my heart. I'm to the point that I don't want to work at all so that he doesn't have to cry for me all day. It doesn't stop here. He never wants to be left with his grandparents any more which he used to love and if I even mention going somewhere without him, he turns on the water works. He acts like I've abandoned him before and he's scared I'll do it again.
This is really taking a toll on me and everyone else around us. He doesn't want to let me out of his sight, he doesn't want to be with the people he's always liked to spend time with, and all of this includes his dad.
What's going on? What can I do? Is this typical of children who stay home with their parent(s)?
4 comments:
I think he is afraid you will leave and go back to work full time again. I think he remembers how it used to be and every time you have to drop him off he thinks its starting up again. It is really normal and kids go through phases like that. Jensen is in one right now since my mom left for a weekend. He only wants me or my mom, and he wants us both in the same room with him at all times or he acts out (gets into stuff, is fussy). I think kids are very sensitive to change and some tend to worry a lot. I know Jensen is really sensitive to things like that too. Hang in there!
Probably 2 things are going on. 1) This is a phase. Reed has hit this phase and freaks out whenever I leave his site. 2) you are pregnant and he can sense that a change is coming. Kids are very perceptive and he probably knows there is a big change coming which can make him very clingy. In the end this too shall pass and things will get back to normal but having him in Daycare even part time is a good thing for him at this age as he gets to learn out to interact with other kids his age and learn to share and behave when you are not around. You are a good Mama and will do whatever is best for you and him. GL is dealing with this new found clingyness :-)
Ian has been having a rough time of it lately too. He cries when I leave him at preschool. But I hang out outside the door a few minutes and he settles down.
Every child goes through separation anxiety, they all just do it at different times. Ian has been doing more of it since turning two, but Melody (my 10 year old) did it more around 1 year-18 months. My friend, who has stayed home with her daughter since day one, managed to avoid separation anxiety until her daughter was 9 years old and all of a sudden she started throwing what we all though were hormonal fits before talking it out and realizing she'd never gone through the normal separation anxiety phase.
The only thing that you said that stands out from my experience is that he fusses all day off and on. Do you see him off and on all day or does the caregiver tell you that he fusses for you?
Ian does a lot better when I let him walk in instead of carrying him in, but lately even that hasn't helped as much as it used it. Maybe their memories are just getting better at this age and things stick with them a little longer.
I think it's fairly typical of kids who have stay at home moms, they are super clingy. every time I have a break and adria stays home with me for even a week she has a really hard time going back to school.
I also agree that he can probably sense something is going on and that you're pregnant. around the time when I first found out I was pregnant adria suddenly was hell to deal with and wouldn't be more than an inch from me without screaming and crying. she got over that eventually but not until I was probably 4 or 5 months.
Sorry I dont have any advice but I hope this is a phase that passes VERY soon for both of you!
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